Last Sunday, my grandmother passed away exactly at 1.00pm at Sarawak General Hospital. I had to go back to Kuching on Friday when I received a call from dad about her worsen condition of getting unconscious on Thursday afternoon.

I cried a lot the night before I went back to Kuching, thinking why it happened in all of a sudden. I cried again when I saw her on the hospital bed, seeing her in coma but able to grip my hand a bit when I put my hand on hers…telling her “Mama, JJ here. Lu ho bo? (How are you?) I just came back from Miri, Mama.”

On Saturday, we thought her condition’s getting better when she responded by opening her eyes when the neurosurgeon pinched her chest. Assuming it should be a better day for her on the next day, dad called me to come to the hospital straight away when Mama’s heartbeat getting weaker…but we reached there 10 minutes late when she released her last breath…and she passed away with tears in her eyes. We all cried…but we all know she doesn’t have to endure the sufferings she had for more than a decade.

She is my beloved grandmother, and no one else can replace how much love she gave to all of us. Like what Uncle Stephen said in his eulogy, Mama will be forever remembered with her friendly reminder without raising her voice. I will miss hers, asking me “J, lu aboi kun ah? (You haven’t sleep yet?)” whenever I stayed up late during the holidays back at home. Of all the things she achieved, the proudest moment of her is when she released a book speaking about her entire life since she was born.

We were all sad to see you gone, Mama…but we are happy of the settings done for your memorial. It was just so beautiful with lots of flowers dedicated to you and we know you’ll love it. Many people came to pay respect to you. Tears can never be avoided when they see you but they feel relieved that you don’t have to take those sufferings anymore.

The mass funeral was held on Tuesday at St Faith’s Anglican Church, followed by the funeral service at Anglican Cemetry at 7th Mile. Mama’s grave is placed next to Kong Kong’s (my grandfather).

Mama, I will miss your presence in our house that you had been living for many years. I will miss your coffee that you make everyday, I will miss the Chinese oldies you always played on the radio every morning, I will miss you always flipping to a Chinese channel to watch a Hokkien series every evening, I will miss the time I always drive you around town, and I will miss you giving me a friendly reminder whenever I stay awake late at night.

Mama, take care and God bless. I know both of you and Kong Kong are back together up there, living happily ever after.

I miss you, Mama.